So right now, I’m having a breakdown of sorts. I wish I knew why I was crying. There is so much going on in my life right now it’s hard to sort anything out. Some of its good, some of its bad, and i’m so lost in it all right now that im almost drowning.
1. I’m working on my senior project which is taking up all my free time and I sometimes wonder if I’m taking on too big of a project for myself.
2. I’m supposed to be working on the senior paper but thanks to my project Im about a week behind and slowing quickly.
3. I just got a new job at Papa Murphy’s and I’m worried about all the time its going to take away from my already full schedule.
4. My friend Jake just informed me that we will be moving into his parents soon to be old house about 9 months sooner than expected (a couple months from now) and I’m worried about rent, food and doing everything else I need to do in order to graduate.
5. I’m going through a breakup with my ex-boyfriend that hurts more than anything, and trying to move on with other people. Even though I’m just taking it slow, it seems things are moving faster than I would like.
I guess its all just overwhealming and I thought I could handle it all. I realized that trying to make everything work the way that I wanted it to wasn’t working, so I decided to go with the flow, just let the current take me where it needed too. Once I just let go into the current, it swept me away and now I feel as if I am being swept away without any means of staying afloat. The current was much faster than I expected it to be and now I wish I had just kept on trying to go upstream. At least then I wasn’t crying.
leftoversushi Said:
on October 17, 2006 at 8:44 pm
break downs suck…i had one two summers ago where everything was awful no matter what…then one day i was talking to a friend about how crappy life was and she said “just think of happy places like reese cups…”
Me: “but reese cups arent a place”
Her: “oh, well there’s always grapefruit…”
it is completely nonsensical but it always makes me smile…that and chocolate…chocolate helps too…
hope your day gets better! and remember “just keep swimming, just keep swimming!”
leftoversushi Said:
on October 18, 2006 at 12:38 pm
so im at school right now and they are dumbtarded to the nth degree and so we are sitting in a computer lab while the kiddies are taking the PSAT and unfortunatly they have blocked everything possible…except this, so yeah, im leaving you a comment! haha! take that evil school!